How to make the days work when you have a low sleep need baby?

Are you the mother or primary carer of a low sleep need baby? It's exhausting having a low sleep need baby because naps are often the only time a primary carer gets a break during the day!

And yet we can't make our babies take more sleep. Attempts to do this often backfire and make the days (and nights) even harder.

A low sleep need baby is also often a high sensory need baby, even if this is just because there are many more hours to fill in each day, compared with a high sleep need baby! Mobiles and toys inside the home usually don't occupy babies for more than a very short period of time, perhaps even just for a few minutes. In addition to the vital step of planning ahead to make each day rich in sensory nourishment and activities outside the house, here are some other ideas which might help.

• Practice deep self-compassion day in, day out. Become good at it. This is a really challenging situation to be in.

• Get highly social, finding a range of new face-to-face parent groups to join in your locality. Work out how you can make new friends!

• You may need to organise babysitting or childcare help sooner than you might have intended, in order to schedule in predictable time for yourself and your own needs, a few times a week.

• Find or make friends with whom you can arrange baby-swaps a few mornings or afternoons a week.

• If your low sleep need baby is in childcare, discuss the importance of not having long naps with the carers, so that your nights don't become excessively broken.

• You might decide to approach this window of time with a low sleep need baby as an unusually rich opportunity to spend a lot of time

  • Walking the streets exploring your locality, for enjoyment and maybe for getting fitter

  • In parks or the natural environment. ... You could take up bird watching (minus the binoculars)?

  • In museums and art galleries. ... Babies love looking at new things!

• Do you have a partner who is your child's other parent? Is it possible to arrange for more help during the day? Even if your partner is the only one earning an income for your family right now, is it possible they could work more flexible hours and assist you during the day, even just for a period of time to get you both through this developmental phase? Only you know what's possible in your own unique family circumstances.

• I'd also suggest reading through the whole of the 'Caring for you' section of The Possums Sleep Program.

The truth is, this time of life with a low sleep need baby will pass much quicker than you can possibly imagine right now. It seems to me that one day, you'll look back and be glad that you did these early months of your small child's life in a way that was (more or less) consistent with the things that matter to you, aligned with your values - even though it really is particularly hard work caring for a precious little baby who has low sleep needs!