When is it time to wean your toddler from a bottle in the night?

Will weaning from the bottle help your little one wake less often in the night?

After about 12 months of age, parents of toddlers who aren't breastfed start to wonder when it's time to stop bottles in the night (if they haven't already). You are the expert on your own small child, and you'll weigh up various considerations to come to your own decision. There is no right or wrong in this, actually.

Here are some important things to know.

1. Weaning from the bottle in the night does not mean that your little one will wake less often in the night. You can find out about normal night waking in toddlers here.

2. Excessive waking in the night is different to normal night waking in toddlers, and is exhausting and unsustainable. You can find out about excessive night waking here.

3. Excessive night waking requires a reset of your little one's body clock settings. You can find out about this here and here.

4. From 12 months of age, there is no need to use formula. Usual whole-fat cow's milk is the best option. Toddler formula does not protect your toddler's brain or immunity more than cow's milk, and contains twice as much carbohydrate and sugar, which is not good for your little one's health. You can find out more here.

Your toddler might drink so much milk from the bottle at night that it decreases her appetite for solid food

This is the main problem parents run into with bottle use in the night. It's the main reason many parents decide to stop bottle use some time after their non-breastfed little one turns one.

If your toddler is only waking once or twice at night, and is generally taking in not much more than 500 millilitres of milk over a 24-hour period, you might be happy to continue using the bottle in the night as the second year of his life progresses, because it makes things easy. A bottle helps your toddler, and everyone else, get back to sleep easily when he wakes at night.

It's normal for toddlers to wake in the night. But if your toddler is at the upper end of normal night waking, and drinking too much milk over a 24-hour period, this may decrease your child's solids intake. You can find out about food and toddlers here.

You might decide that your toddler has a healthy appetite and the bottles in the night are working for now. You might also decide that your little one is taking in too much milk, and you have to change that. You have a couple of options.

• Limiting the amount of milk you offer in the night. This can worsen your toddler's dialling up in the night though, if he doesn't want settle back to sleep without a bottle. You might experiment with this. For some families though, the strategy of not offering a bottle with each wake prolongs night-time distress.

• Weaning from the bottle completely in the night. This might mean that for some time nights become hard work, without the benefit of sucking and milk, which so quickly dial our little ones down. During this time you'd be

  • Making sure that the settings on her body clock are in sync with yours

  • Using cuddles and other sensory motor strategies (such as rocking, walking, singing) to dial her down when she wakes at night.

Does using a bottle at night cause tooth decay in toddlers?

Children over 12 months of age who take the bottle in the night are at slightly increased risk of dental caries, and this risk increases after two years of age. This is helpful to know as you weigh up when to stop your toddler's bottle in the night. Some families do a quick swipe over the little one's teeth with water on a soft toothbrush after a night-time bottle, reserving fluoridated toothpaste for daytimes, when it's easier to wash out that little mouth.

However, avoiding bottles of milk in the night has only a small effect on the prevention of caries in toddlers. The three main things which help prevent toddler dental decay are

• A wholesome diet with no sweets and minimal sugars, juice or sticky dried fruits

• Water flouridation

• Cleaning his teeth with flouridated tooth-paste.

Our society often judges the choices mothers make quite harshly

At the top of this page there is a photo of a weary but devoted mother, holding and cuddling her toddler in the night as the little one finishes a bottle of milk! She's doing the hard work of caring for and protecting her child, over and over, day and night! When I look at her, I think how loving she is, how brave she is, tending night after night to this feisty little person, her precious child! I find myself hoping that she has good support.

But some may have the view that the child in this photo doesn't need a bottle in the night. Some might think that this mother is spoiling her toddler, or unable to set boundaries and assert parental authority. These kinds of damaging judgements are often directed towards mothers in our society. We can be quite moralistic as a society about how parents feed their small children! In fact, this woman is responding to her little one in the way that her heart, and all the neuroscience, tell us is best for her toddler's wellbeing and developing brain. You can find out about how to manage others' judgements here.

It seems to me that you simply need the evidence, as best we have it, and then you'll experiment and find your own way through, in a way that works, more or less (since nothing ever works perfectly), for your own unique family.

Recommended resources

World Health Organisation: Infant and young child feeding - key facts

Does bottle feeding your toddler to sleep cause bad habits?

Would it help with your toddler's sleep to stop the bottle (if you've been bottle feeding)?

When is it time to wean your toddler from a bottle in the night?

Selected references

Julien S. Prophylaxis of caries with fluoride for children under five years. BMC Pediatrics. 2021;21 (Suppl 1)(351):https://doi.org/10.1186/s12887-12021-02702-12883.

Khan SY, Schroth RJ, De Jesus V. A systematic review of caries risk in children < 6 years of age. International Journal of Paediatric Dentistry. 2023;00:doi:10.1111/ipd.13140.

Van Meijeren-van Luneren A, Voortman T, Elfrink M. Breastfeeding and childhood dental caries: results from a socially diverse birth cohort study. Caries Research. 2021;55:153-161.

Veile A, Miller V. Duration of breast feeding in ancestral environments. Encyclopedia of Evolutionary Psychological Science. https://link.springer.com/referenceworkentry/10.1007/978-3-319-19650-3_818: Springer, Cham.; 2021.